Jesse Bray

Tennesse Tim's Weather Report (beta) - The ONLY Weather and Unsolicited Dating Advice App

by
The ONLY app that combines wild weather forecasts with even worse dating advice. Tennessee Tim delivers daily forecasts, gut feelings, and emotional turbulence—all in one beard-powered, pink-hatted package. Warning: 80% chance of unsolicited opinions.

Add a comment

Replies

Best
Jesse Bray

“Forecast: ‘Grumpy with a chance of sparkle.’ I blushed.”

Eeyore

Jesse Bray

“Tim told me I was the storm. I cried purple tears.”

Maleficent

Jesse Bray

“App whispered: ‘It’s going to rain. Hide the child.’”

Stewie Griffin

Jesse Bray

“He said: ‘95% chance of sass.’ I felt SEEN.”

Daffy Duck

Jesse Bray

“App told me to stop haunting umbrellas. I won’t.”

Casper the Petty Ghost

Jesse Bray

“Forecast: ‘Rain. You should probably text Ash back.’”

Misty

Jesse Bray

“Tim’s beard has more wisdom than any bender I’ve met.”

Uncle Iroh

Jesse Bray

“Forecast: ‘Gloomy. Avoid lab explosions.’”

Professor Utonium

Jesse Bray

“App told me to bring a jacket and delete my ex’s number. Only did one. Guess which.”

Leslie Who Lives for Drama

Jesse Bray

“It said ‘gusty winds and trust issues ahead.’ HOW DO YOU KNOW.”

Patrice With the Wind-Tossed Wig

First
Previous
•••
424344
•••
Next
Last